“WHERE DO YOU BELONG TO?”

Nomads-on-Camels-©Henrietta-Butler

In all our lifetimes we hear numbers of questions, but a single one that is really my favourite is “Where are you from?”. It seems very simple to be a question, I mean you all be thinking that there are even harder questions to ask and answer about than this. Yeah! That’s right but this is what played a very vital role in my life till now.

Generally whenever we have been asked this question that “Where do you belong/ Where are you from?”, we come up with some place’s name as a reply. Okay! That’s actually we are supposed to say. But I have a little different way of answering this question when it is asked to me, especially informally.

We belong to the place where we are born or raised up or where our parents own a house or where we go in our summer vacations to meet our grandparents. But if I talk about the travelers such as the Banjaras (the nomads/ people without fixed habitation), what would they respond to this question, as they do not have a definite place to build a house and live in. I have heard a lot of times my father saying that our lives are like that of the Banjaras, as we have to move from one place to the another, with our house packed in a few irons and wooden boxes, that travels miles. Actually, my father was in Air Force, seeing transfers after every 2, 3 or 5 years. This is the reason why it’s vaguely typical and more exciting for me to answer this question when anybody asks me. I’m accustomed to it.

I have been to the extreme south of the country and extreme north, I have seen the art of the East also. So it’s hard for me to answer in just a word that where I actually belong to because I have seen my parent building home at very places we’ve lived. I have seen the long road trips and the sun rise in Kanyakumari, Howrah bridge in Kolkata, Film City in Hyderabad, Leh Ladakh in Jammu & Kashmir and Toy Trains in Coimbatore and more. There is one more place which I would want to mention separately, which is the place where I was born, the place where my grandparents lived, the place where I have been every summer and winter vacations, sometimes in autumn breaks also, the place where my grandpa used to put rope in the ceiling and made me swing.

I belong to all these places, there is no single place, there are places where I have lived, where my childhood was spent because for me belonging doesn’t only means the place you were born but also the places you have poured a major piece of your heart in.

~Sakshi Rajput
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I’M NO STRINGS ATTACHED

Love is a great feeling, to be loved by someone looks nice, but to love someone who is not as into you as you are in them takes away all your courage. Walking along a path alone seems longer and if you have someone it looks so easy, but if you are with somebody who is addicted to their own stuff the path becomes even more longer and harder.

Materialistic things are not the only things you ask for. A real heart dreams for an emotional connection and an ordinary soul would definitely run towards a heart which understands the same language, emotions and pictures as yours. But generally, having found by someone who is the sole soul to understand your soul, it’s difficult to look forward to a life with them. You see dreams, you hallucinate, you even generate a strong desire for them but you can’t help yourself out.

The dilemma is all you can have after such things going around, so better keep yourself “no strings attached” and have a life where you value your own inner person and try to build peace with the love you have inside you.

~ Sakshi Rajput

WHAT FADES AND WHAT REMAINS

There is a quote by K.M. Shea, “Beauty fades, but the heart remains the same…“. An Earth born human has uncountable desires and interests, which are nothing but mere a lie.

Today I am overwhelmed, maybe I am extraordinarily overwhelmed. But I need to learn one thing that it is not stable. No pain, no sorrow, no pleasure and no luxury is permanent. Today I am here, maybe tomorrow I will lose my existence. It’ll fade, everything fades and all I can do is to accept.

All these promises you hear and you make will fade someday or the other. Things like beautiful faces, hair, a good figure, happy times, a good company, weather and a lot more, it all has to go away. Life itself shows you that it has a grey side also, maybe, to which a lot of people are not familiar of.

Even the chlorophyll breaks down, the green colour disappears and it changes to yellow and orange. Then the pales fall down and bury into the land.
Your beautiful face that has all the charm today, which shines like nothing ever can in this entire world (hypothetically) and the body, muscular or soft, all will be gone one day. The firmness you carry, will turn out to be dull. How the body, you thought was free of flaws, underwent hundreds of marks and flaws, you will have no idea about it.

Colours fade, promises fade, beauties also fade, all that remains is a heart full of love, so don’t only cherish the colours but also the heart that carries both day and night.

~SAKSHI RAJPUT

CHASE YOURSELF

All my life I kept chasing other people, personalities and love. People changed, personalities had two faces and love, that actually never ever tried to chase me back. All of which I wanted to grab in my one fist, shattered like I had no intensions to keep them. Life, a mirage, or the life I desire or yearn for is a mirage, I’m confused.

Here, now, when I’m about 22 years, 1 month and 26 days old, I’m confused about life. When I used to play in my childhood, I had always admired being an adult or young. I was fascinated by a life where you are definitely not going to have any interruption, I thought people live their lives on their own terms and conditions. But now here when I am this old, I think how innocent was I to think like that way. Because now when I try to understand life, it feels complicated. You see a new page everyday, scripted and scrolled by the Almighty. Earlier I used to think I can write my life’s story but later I realized, though I am a writer yet I can only pen down the things on paper which has already happened.

I feel like I am sitting on the driver’s seat, that car is a similar as life but the steering wheels, steering wheels are not within my reach.

So here I was about to talk about chasing various things in life. Sometimes when I introspect, it feels chasing people or chasing wrong people, doesn’t matter, hurts anyway. I mean, why the fuck I am not chasing my ownself? Is that any different from the mankind? I mean, does he have three legs or four ears? No, nothing among these. The reason to this is, I feel, I’m not that good, beautiful, influencing or sexy enough to attract somebody. I feel that I have been sent to earth with flaws and lackings. But does that mean I’m the only one with flaws and lackings? No. Even the richest guys of all the times failed to take their wealth with them. Weren’t that the biggest defeat to a person who all his kept himself busy chasing wealth? Yes, a big big yes.

Chasing Love
If I talk about chasing love, then I should also mention the thing that love is a never ending feeling. I mean, why do we need to chase the person with whom we are in love? I guess, we all love our mothers too, so do we need to chase them all the time to cook us food and care for us? Technically or non technically, no.

Don’t chase love, it’s not a target given to you by the opposite team in a cricket match. Love, definitely is not a target. Don’t just run after it, run along with it instead.

Chase Your Dreams
Chase your dreams, no matter what you do, where you reach, just keep chasing your desires every single moment, that will be how you will explore more things in you, which weren’t discovered yet ever before. Run after your dreams, whether you saw one with open eyes or at 4 a.m. in the morning. Keep pursuing them. Because after 10 years from now, when you will turn back and see, you definitely going to realise that chasing people didn’t pay you a penny but chasing your dreams and yourself actually did.

~Sakshi Rajput

WHY DID YOU FALL FOR HER?

why did you fall for her?

she isn’t a woman
you’ll fall for in
just first glance,
she isn’t a woman
who has hundreds
of admirers,
she isn’t a woman
with “I’m perfect”
kind of attitude,

she is the one
who has millions of
unspoken words,
she is the one
with thousands of
dreams yet to accomplish,
she is the one
with love on her lips and
beauty in her eyes,
she is the one
who will keep all your
belongings as if they’re her own,
she is the type of
woman you’ll meet
once in your lifetime.

may be, that is why
you fall for her
every now and then.

~sakshirajput

It’s our story

While finding love in fake, I eventually found love in somebody who was really awake. Not responding to either world’s, he responded and recognised me. I sighed. When he saw the heights of my devotion was really high, he was surprised.

I wanted him to hold me where I step back and scold me(with love) where I lack. The stars in this cosmos seemed like you have pinned the small tiny pearls over my head so that wherever I walk I’ll have remembrance of your love.

-Sakshi Rajput

It ain’t enough

Since the day we met, we have travelled a journey heading from strangers to beloved. Many a times I’ve resisted myself from saying you “I love you” before you have accepted the same. I couldn’t even tell you how hard it was to stand in opposite of my own, still I did. The ultimate proposal day – you finally said “I love you” and I muttered the same near your ear.

Today, I’m searching, thinking, weaving, hunting and trying to discover the words more powerful than “I love you” because they ain’t enough now as my love for you has crossed rivers and mountains, has drown oceans and volcanoes and has experienced rain and sunshine all at once.

I have fallen so deep in the ocean of his love
that to come up I have to die.

~ Sakshi Rajput